The Father's Mother's Day Gift.

Mother's Day, the day that mothers get doted on, recognized, appreciated, and spot-lighted. Children say the sweetest things, do all the chores, and recognize all the sacrifices moms make. Unfortunately, I found myself having to steer the boat of "recognize me, honor me, celebrate me," and I found myself very frustrated and hurt. I knew this wasn't right but I knew this wasn't anyone's fault but my own. It's not even their fault for being princesses that don't know how to celebrate others because I do it so naturally they never have to. The problem was nowhere but in myself.  You know what though? That's my favorite type of problem. I know that my Daddy God will tell me the secrets of heaven and make me more like Him. During worship at church this frustrated and confused Mother's Day morning, I turned my eyes off myself and focused on the Lion of Judah. Let me tell you what I learned about myself when I turned my eyes off of me:

He is the Lion, the King of all kings, and I am a warrior princess, equipped to take enemy schemes and turn them into Kingdom victories. What a powerful place for a mama to stand! And, I'm not just raising other independent warrior princess lionesses; I am raising warrior princess lionesses to work as a unified force, in a pride, for the glory of the Lion King. Mmmmmmm. So good! Such a parenting strategy shift! What a nice gift; better than the Melting Pot's Brie and Bacon Fondue (which is saying something)! Thank you husband, for not cringing at the price tag of that Mother's Day gift. 

But that wasn't all He wanted to give me. He also showed me that I had been looking for accolades, recognition, and the gift of being known, from my kids. How frustrating is THAT?! What kid can actually recognize the gift of their mother until they themselves are a parent?! No forced art project from school will ever touch that place in my heart--and it shouldn't! The Father was offering for me to get my recognition, accolades, and known-ness as a mother, from Him rather than my kids. What a divine shift! It takes the frustration off my heart and the pressure off my kids and husband. I'm not even mad right now that instead of diamonds and bubble baths, I have a sink full of dirty dishes and a couple extra pounds from the fondue splurge. 

Mom's, that invitation is to you as well. Go have a quiet moment (even if it's with headphones at the kitchen sink full of dishes), and ask Father God what He wants to say about you as a Mother. I promise it's only kindness, adoration, and hope He wants to bring to this conversation. Be brave. Ask Him. Then go worship Him through your mothering! 

GAME PLAN

I blew it this morning. I lost my cool with my kids this morning. I lost it bigger than usual. I woke up early for my alone time with Jesus and asked for His help in strategizing our morning. But as soon as I woke the kids up, I could feel myself building in irritation. I can see it coming when I give them short, one-word answers, avoid eye contact, and tell them to do things for themselves when they ask for help. They were behind in getting ready, so when they’d usually be leaving for school, we were scrambling to get to family devotion time—just to eek it in. But rather than being attentive and engaged, they  were distractible and distracting. When it came time to pray for them and their day, I offered a prayer of frustration and thanks. “Thank you Father, that you love these girls just the same every day. My frustration with them doesn’t indicate a frustration of Yours. Be with them Jesus and let you r love be known to them.” I tersely told them to get going to school, but Middle girl couldn’t find her coat. Apparently, that was the straw that broke my allotted grace. I am not proud to say that I was yelling at my sweet gifts, like they had killed my dog, over a coat. The older two found the coat, tears streaming, and left for school. The youngest one went to take a bath, saying no thanks to my offer for a hug. Now that’s when it REALLY hit. She never refuses a hug. Trying every psycho-babble trick I knew for calming down, trying to pray and repent, crying my face off, texting my husband, I realized this morning wasn’t really about my kids and their inadequacies, or even my inadequacies, it was about a battle being waged in the spirit realm. What really tipped me off, was that I couldn’t even problem solve or reason with myself. I even believed for a moment, that my children would be better off if I’d just wake them up in the morning and have them get themselves ready for school, while I could just go back to bed. I recognized that these were not my ideas, but the ideas of a dark enemy.  But in my inner chaos, I couldn’t think of how to form a battle plan. And to top it off, I wasn’t really interested in talking to Jesus, because I felt so ashamed of myself (isn’t that the most ridiculous thing you’ve ever heard?!).  I called a dear friend, knowing that she could help me sort my thoughts out and help me get set on the right track again. She listened while I spewed. She asked helpful questions that led me in sorting my thoughts. She encouraged me, reminding me of my strengths as a mother, as a child of Father God. Then she prayed for me. In her prayer, she got a picture. The picture was that this battle was like a video game, and when I beat this level, there’s going to be a new level. I’m going to win a new power to help me with the new levels. She exhorted me to ask Holy Spirit for strategies for this level, and to ask what that special reward was for beating this level.

After hanging up, I grabbed my prayer journal, having a course set before me, I wrote out what Holy Spirit was telling me about this video game. I write this for two reasons: 1. I want to remember what this battle looked like and what the victory will look like. 2. I wonder how many other moms need to hear this today.

• Hero character: Mom
• Setting: Our home
• Objectives:
  • Get all kids to school with lunch, homework, fed and feeling secure, empowered, and Spirit-filled.
• Obstacles:
  • Dog likes to run (and never turns down a snuggle from a distracted daughter.
  • Kids are distractible—VERY distractible.
  • Enemy Snake wants to choke as much life, joy, and abudnace out of the morning. He seeks to separate the family (divide) and have the kids sent to school angry, lonely, and already having failed.
• Complete Objectives to receive authority and a sword of the Spirit. This sword is required for access to future missions. You are allowed unlimited attempts to pass this level, but BEWARE: The longer it takes to complete this mission, the more damage the children take and the more relationships will suffer.
• Strategies
  • Work as a team
    • Share objectives with family
    • Battle as a unified front.
    • BEGIN the morning with worship and devotionals, THEN get ready for school.
  • Watch for these red flags:
    • Minimized eye contact
    • Not wanting to hear stories or concerns.
    • Not wanting to be helpful
  • To counter red-flags:
    • Remember the TRUE objective is send out children overflowing with love to the community we’ve been set in!
    • Give a hug
    • Stop, listen, and giggle.

I know that this revelation isn’t going to make our mornings run smoothly. My kids aren’t going to be able to stay on task any better than they do without my revelation. What changes, though, is who I recognize the enemy as and what he’s trying to steal. The ultimate goal is to bring up little people who really do look like Jesus.

China on my heart

I woke up from an enchanting dream this morning. Chuck and I were taking our new Asian baby boy through the Wal Mart parking lot on a toy motorcycle. He was so sweet and funny, and we were enjoying his silly faces. Please note, at this point, I have no intention, nor desire to adopt. I wish I did, but I just don't. When I told my friend Nicki about my dream, she mentioned that her husband's first grade class was praying for China today.

At that, I felt an urgency to pray for China. And I shared that urgency with the girls. I asked them to join me in seeking God's face for how to pray for China. We put on some worship music, got out our favorite pillows, and asked Jesus to show us what he wanted to show us about China. We utilized a new tool we learned about, called soaking, and lay there individually waiting for what God wanted to show us. Sometimes He shows us pictures, sometimes, He tells us secrets, and today, He did both.

Rebekah shared that she saw a maze, with fire all around. There was only one way through the maze, and it was dangerous, but the reward at the end, was gold and silver and riches! Maddy shared that she saw Chinese families having church in their houses, and the bad cops were being defeated by good cops! Izzy said that God had presents for us, and those presents were all of God's power in us. I saw a map of China, but not an aerial view. I saw fingers stirring the atmosphere above China, then an open Bible rising from the soil. From the sky, a fiery meteor filled with jewels and gems began to fall.

I wonder if disaster is headed China's way. I know this, though: God is stirring the spiritual atmosphere of China.  Whatever disaster comes, it brings beauty and healing with it. Hardened things must be broken in order to be renewed. I pray for the Christians in China. That when disaster strikes, they will rise up to be Christ in a dark time--in very practical ways. And I pray for China's government. That the "bad cops" would be overtaken by the "good cops." 

And did I mention? I'm crazy giddy that my children are encountering Jesus! The secrets that He's telling them are straight from the Bible! All I can say about that, is "Yay God! Do it some more!"



Let the Lion Roar

I've been reading through the minor prophets in my Bible lately. My Bible College days are far behind me now, and it's hard to remember why they were called the minor prophets,as their message is not minor! The prophesies in them are silver-tongued. They are concise and cut to the core of the issue. I want to be that way! Being silver-tongued is actually something that was prophesied over me once, but for those who know me, concise and cutting to the core is not my specialty, but it's something I believe God wants to do in me. I pray that this post would be anointed, would speak to your heart in a way that I cannot-that only the Holy Spirit can.

I'm reading in Amos right now. It was particularly cutting this morning. I wanted to use this post as a call of repentance to the church. If you have asked Jesus to save you from the consequences of your sin, you are part of this; part of the church. Amos 2:11-12 God says that He raised up prophets and Nazirites, but we gave wine to the Nazirites and commanded the prophet saying "Do not prophesy!". Ouch! The church in America (with some exceptions of course) has told the prophet to stop prophesying because his message is uncomfortable. Let the prophet fear God rather than men. Amos 3:7 says that God does NOTHING without revealing it to His prophets. The prophet is a roaring lion! He speaks forth God's word, His heart, His purposes.We would be far less surprised when good things happen, when bad things happen, if we were allowing the prophets to speak. Repent, on behalf of the church, for quieting the roaring lion, telling God we didn't want to hear His voice. No longer do we want to let lies lead us astray. We weren't meant to be comfortable! Amos 2:4 tells us that the lies we believe came from the generations before us. Let it stop here!

Now, regarding the Nazirite: A Nazirite was a person that was set aside from birth to live a life of devotion to God. How often do we discourage the Nazirites in our lives by persuading them to worldliness?! By mocking the ways in which they are different?! Our strengths are not our own, but God's. It is Him alone that is our source of strength and boldness.

Lord, prepare the way for your prophets to roar, and your Nazirites to be a true light!

Free indeed!

I've been a little hush-hush (in the blogging world anyway) about my health journey. But today is my unveiling! Today I finished a 60 day on-line, Bible Study, weight-loss course, called Setting Captives Free. They have several courses relating to freedom from eating, pornography, drugs and alcohol, sexual sin, etc. Here's the testimony I shared on my last lesson:

"I had been on a diet for the better part of 6 years. Most recently, I was on a 1400 calorie diet, burning 400 calories/day through exercise, and could not lose weight. If I did lose weight, I would just yo-yo between a 10 pound range (gaining and losing for over 3 years). I would do well on my diet for a short time, just looking forward to my "cheat day." On my cheat day, I would eat whatever I wanted for the whole day long. One cheat day was never enough. One day, I become so frustrated with this cycle and the lack of results that I told the Lord I was finished. I knew that if I would give it to Him, it would be fine. Why didn't I realize this years ago?! Not much later, I found Setting Captives Free. It was an answer to prayer. I realized that everytime I went to food when bored, excited, worried, frustrated, socializing, etc, rather than to God, I was putting food before God. I was letting food be my god and I was practicing idolatry. Even on a diet, food was my god because I was always thinking about it, seeking salvation through a diet. No wonder I couldn't lose weight. God had left me to my own devices. I see now, that my lack of weight-loss before, was God's grace to lead me to Setting Captives Free. I have found FREEDOM! I am free at last! Food does not guide my life anymore! I don't have to buy diet food or look for diet meals at a restaurant, and there's no need for a cheat day. I just enjoy what God has given me (and yes, usually it's not a salad). I have lost 23 pounds! But mostly, I have found a deeper, closer walk with God! I will never diet again! I don't need a cheat day anymore! I have found satisfaction in Him (and lost the weight to confirm it's effectiveness!)!"

So, I am currently the lightest I have ever been in my adult life. At my heaviest, I weighed 250 pounds. While pregnant with Rebekah (7 years ago), I had gestational diabetes. Never wanting to deal with that again (and vomiting several times a day due to pregnancy hormones), I lost some weight. For the last 4 years, I was stuck between 210 and 220. When I stared Setting Captives Free, I weighed 222 pounds. Today, I weigh 199 pounds. I wish I had before and after pictures, but I don't. I'm sure if I really wanted, I could conjure some up. I want all the glory to go to God though. For the first time in my life, I'm not worried about it. Now all I need the scale for is a barometer of my obedience to God, to keep me accountable to if God is my God, or if food is my god. I have never enjoyed my relationship with God more than I do now!

Next step, I've signed up for the Mentor Course to become a mentor for Setting Captives Free. Click here if interested in the program for yourself. There's an option to add a friend to be your accountability partner. If you'd like, you can add my address (mombeem@yahoo.com).

Movie Review:: Judy Moody and the Not-so-bummer-summer.

WHY is it raining in the middle of July?! Apparently, the rest of the nation is taking all of the energies of the sun and it doesn't have the energy to shine here (not bitter, just annoyed). I HAD to get the kids out of the house for little to no money. Since The Science Factory isn't open until 12:30 this week, we chose the buck-fifty theater. Except on Mondays (the day we went), tickets are only 75 cents!!!!

Judy Moody is such a fun movie! Judy Moody has the fashion sense inspired by Rebekah (I'm sure), and an attitude inspired by a 9 year-old that wants to be more mature. It's the kind of movie that reminds you what it's like to be a kid, teaches you to take time to have fun with your kids, and what's important in life. I totally want to make a family thrill chart (much like Judy's in the movie).

There's friendship, forgiveness, family, and FUN! It's clean (aside from using "crap" a couple of times--which I'm guilty of nearly every day). There are some parts that some kids might find scary: A Big-foot sighting in the middle of the night that scares the characters, and a spoof horror movie that Judy and her friend go to in an attempt to earn Thrill Points. My girls didn't mind these scenes at all and they are usually kinda chickens. I was always amazed how REAL Judy Moody seemed. And it's always nice to see kids learn a lesson the full-circle sort of way.

Although the lack of sun in Oregon might try to ruin our summer, we will choose to have a not-so-bummer-summer! Thanks, Judy Moody, for the inspiration!

A Funeral Fit For a Fish

Cutie Patootie, of the Beem home, was a good fish. He was the object of several art projects and the subject of Rebekah's first 2-point expository paragraph. He is survived by his first owners Rebekah, Maddy, and Isabelle. Cutie was a successor of the late-great Red Rover. Although he made several nests in hopes of a family, a mate never came, baby fishies never ensued. Cutie Patootie, you will be missed. Your tricks brought joy to our family as did your fishy kissy faces.